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The Best Way to Describe Your Characters' Physical Appearance

7/21/2014

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If you’ve read my latest post entitled Do You Make These 5 Mistakes When Describing Your Character’s Appearance? you already know what not to do. The following tips offer options for what you should do in describing your fictional characters.

Let well-controlled dialogue describe your character naturally. 

Notice in the following excerpts that the dialogue is not contrived—it seems natural—and it also reveals how the characters feel about themselves or about each other.

Excerpt from "A Type of Inoculation" by Yaasha Moriah

“You just wait,” Elena said. “I’ll hardly be gone and you’ll have a slew of suitors on the doorstep just begging for your hand.” 

“I don’t want a slew of suitors,” Kieva objected.  “I just want one, someone who won’t care that my hair’s too slippery to stay neat, or that my eyes are gray, or that my cheeks are pocked from the red pox, or that I’ve got a mole on my neck.” 

“You can’t even see the mole on your neck,” Elena rolled her eyes.  “And your pocks aren’t terribly noticeable.”

Excerpt from "The Memory" by Yaasha Moriah

Kamau glanced back at his passenger. “Is that haircut regulation?” 

Trey ran his hands through his sandy hair. “They say I’ll have to get it cut before the semester begins.” 

“Oh no!” Surya pouted. “I like the shaggy look.” 

“I wish I had your hair, Kamau,” Trey said. “You rock the close-cropped look.”

Give a short, bite-sized description of each character. 

When possible, let the descriptions reinforce the story’s plotline (see the underlined portion in the Shiner excerpt). You’re not going to get all the relevant details in at one shot. That’s okay. Just go for the most important details.

Excerpt from "Shiner" by Yaasha Moriah

One of my fellow pilgrims was a young man who appeared, from his fine clothes and authoritative bearing, to be nobly born.  At the moment, he was drowsing with his red cap shading his eyes and his hands behind his head.  My first glimpse of his face was disappointing--the incognito king I sought might be able to darken his hair, but he couldn’t change his eyes from brown to blue. 

Excerpt from "The Dry Queen" (working title) by Yaasha Moriah

“Maka ‘Ike! Welcome to Plumeria!” 

As Maka stepped lightly from the gangplank, a florid-faced man with short hair whitening at the temples approached, his arms open wide. A broad belt of white contained his bulging middle, which was further concealed in the long folds of a robe of deepwater green. 

A young man stood a step behind him, watching. The fullness of his beard, the depth of time in his eyes, and the touch of the weather upon his skin marked his age in his late twenties or early thirties.

Use contrast.

If a character expects to see a certain set of features and finds the real appearance to be very different, you’ve just effortlessly described your character. (See the excerpt from Prism to see how this concept works to describe Jem.) Similarly, if two characters have very different appearances, use the situation as an excuse to contrast them. (See the excerpt from Shiner to see how this concepts works to describe the narrator.)

Excerpt from "Prism" by Yaasha Moriah

[Context: Will is struggling through a nightmare in which he is fighting the Red Hoods, a mysterious band identified by clothing, skin, and eyes, all of the color red. His friend Jem has come to rouse him.] 

The world faded, sharpened, and then reality slapped Will across the face. “Hey!” Jem ducked and skittered out of reach, his voice edged with panic. “It’s just me! Chill out!” Will peered at Jem’s face, his eyes narrowed. No, Jem wasn’t red. He was the color of earth and coffee beans. His eyes were almost black.

Excerpt from "Shiner" by Yaasha Moriah

When Watch heard what I wanted of him, he began giggling like a schoolgirl. Watch loves jokes and this one, to him, was a real ripsnorter. 

While he was blackening his eyes with soot and darkening his skin tone with an oily mixture, I was also undergoing a transformation. Using Thieves’ Court cosmetics, I lightened my dark features and hid my black eye. Lastly, I parted my hair in a different style and reminded myself to grow decent facial hair. 

My guard was unfamiliar with my features and Watch was a decent actor, similar in appearance to me. No one would know the difference until I was long gone.

Important Tips

  • Keep your descriptions short. Aim for about two sentences at a time. This doesnot mean that you should pile six descriptors into each sentence. Pick out two or three of the most prominent details and leave the rest for later.
  • Space your descriptions out. You can do this over several paragraphs or even over the course of a few chapters. (Just beware of including descriptions too late, after your reader has already formed a strong mental image.) For example, in one place, establish your character’s hair color and basic clothing. In another place, add in eye color and face shape. Later on, make note of jewelry or other markings, like scars or tattoos.
  • Reinforce the description periodically. If the appearance has been established in Chapter One, mention a particular aspect (eye color, for example) in Chapter Five, just as a reminder for the reader. Continue to mention other key features throughout the story.

If you like something I wrote here, you are free to share/quote it with credit and a link back to the original page on my website.
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    I write YA/adult fantasy & sci-fi that explores fantastic and interconnected worlds, with stories that burn through the darkest realities with hope and redemption.
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